36 Things That I Love

Today's my birthday.  Yes, I was born on Pearl Harbor Day and, as my high school principal said, "You're the second disaster on that day!"  In honor of my big day I'll share 36 Things That I Love (kinda like Oprah, only more realistic):

1.   The Daily Message by Eugene Peterson is The Message Bible translation broken up into portions for you to read each day.  The best part is that each week you have one day to reflect on your reading or to catch-up if you missed a day or two.  And The Message translation is very easy reading in modern language.

2.  One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp Hubby got me this book for Christmas last year and it is life-changing.  I've leant this book out three times and each woman who has read it has said, "Wow!"

3.  Bleu Cheese - I do love me some rotted dairy products and Bleu Cheese is right at the top of the list!   The other day I had a Pecan-Bleu Cheese spread that knocked my socks off.  I am going to have to work on that recipe and I promise I will share it!  Bleu cheese on a burger or steak, in a salad, homemade salad dressing...the only thing I haven't tried it in is ice cream.  And I probably won't.

4.  Yoga pants - I'm not a jeans girl.  I've found very few jeans that fit right.  And none that I want to wear everyday and work in.  If I ever do find the Holy Grail of Denim, I'm buying 87 pairs and you'll be the first to know.

5.  Long sleeved t-shirts - I really only have two types of farm shirts:  tank tops and long sleeved t-shirts.  If it's too cold for tank tops, then it must be long sleeved shirt weather.  I have one with a picture of an igloo on it.  Kiddo3 points and says, "Tur-tur".  She thinks it's a turtle.

6.  My mom - I haven't seen her in over a year.  By far, the longest we have ever gone without seeing each other.  Although we talk on the phone often, I miss her desperately.

7.  Wheat Thins - When I have a cheese ball or dip that requires a cracker, I go for Wheat Thins.  Triscuit is salted cardboard.  Chicken in a Biscuit is too much going on in my mouth.  Ritz crumble too easily.  I love Wheat Thins.  There is a deli in Jamestown that I love to stop on a roadtrip to get their chicken salad and a box of 'Thins'.  Perfect road snack...I've even had it for breakfast!

8.  Milking my goats - I think I've pretty well documented my love of goats.

9.  Eggs - I love our eggs.  I love eggs as much as I love potatoes, I've never met one I didn't like.  Hard boiled, poached, scrambled, fried (over medium, please), omelets, quiche...I love them all!

10.  Bacon - You can't say that you love eggs without also saying that you love bacon.  Especially the bacon from our own pigs.  It is fabulous!

11.  Mulled cider - I'm not a coffee drinker, so hot chocolate and tea used to be the extent of my hot beverage selection.  Not anymore!  Some cider on the stove with a broken-up cinnamon stick, a sliced up orange and a few cloves.  Bring to a simmer for 20 minutes.  OH MAN!

12.  Playing the piano - I know there were times in my life that I begged my mom to let me quit playing.  But 30 years after I started, I'm so glad she didn't let me.  My kids will all start with piano.  They can move to the guitar if they'd like.  But they will all learn to play one of the two.

13.  Reading - I love to read.  I usually have a few books going at once.  Especially during the winter.  I shared some of my favorites HERE.  Hubby and I read a LOT.  And my mom was a teacher who loved great literature.  Between the two of us, we have thousands of books.  Hence the reason we have a room dedicated as a library in our basement.

14.  Teaching - I love to teach.  Anything, really!  When I interviewed for my corporate trainer job, I knew NOTHING about health insurance.  The VP asked why he should hire me and I looked him right in the eye and said, "Because I can teach."  I've never taught little people, but Kiddo1 and I are having a blast doing preschool together.

15.  The slightly wet dog smell of my son's hair - If Kiddo2 hasn't had a shampoo in a while, he gets the characteristic wet dog smell.  And when we snuggle together ("Mama?  Can you just hold me a little bit?"), and he nuzzles under my chin, I smell it.  I know he won't always smell like a wet dog and when that day comes, I will miss it.

16.  Stockman Grass Farmer - Hubby and I don't fight over the remote, we fight over this publication.  Every month it arrives packed full of information, ideas, successes and failures.  Al's Obs alone is reason enough to buy a subscription!

17.  Acres USA - As long as we're talking about magazines, here's another one we can't live without.  When we moved, John called them to change our address.  We couldn't wait until it was forwarded, we had to get it as soon as possible.  This is an an excellent eco-agriculture magazine that challenges and informs us like no other.

18.  Writing notes - I know there are lots of ways to type and record notes.  All sort of apps and whatnot.  But I still love to write with a good gel pen and a thick paper.  I have a little red bound sketchbook that I keep in my purse to write all manner of notes:  from presentations to shopping lists to addresses, it's my go-to "app".

19.  Ponytails - Hubby likes my hair long.  I don't want it in my face.  Therefore, I wear a ponytail often all the time.  I am in desperate need of a haircut.  Hopefully, that will fix this lack-of-style rut I'm in.

20.  Kiddo 3's voice - It's taken this child a lot longer to talk than the other two.  But, like her sister, she developed physical proficiency before verbal.  When you are running at 11 months to keep up with your older brother and sister, speaking takes a back seat.  She can still outrun her very verbal brother, but she is talking more now.  It is sweet and cute.

21.  Taking Kiddo1 with me - She is a great traveler and loves to come along, especially when she is by herself.  She feels very important!  I have taken her to meetings and when we got up to leave, people were surprised to find there was a little girl in the room.  She usually packs her Dora backpack with some things she wants to do and works happily and quietly.  I'm hoping to take her more places in the future!

22.  Extended wear contacts - I've had contacts since the 8th grade.  Eight years ago, I started wearing extended wear lenses.  I wear them for a week, then take them out for a day or two.  I wear the same lenses for a month and then use a new pair.  For a busy mom like me, this is a great way to wear contacts without having to fuss with them every morning and night.  I sleep, shower, swim with them in.  Love 'em!

23.  Agriculture Magazines I don't necessarily agree with - I won't name any names here, but Hubby and I both think it is valuable to read widely.  To know what is happening in other realms of agriculture, not just in grass farming (for example).  Always good to know what the other side is up to!

24.  Hubby - When I say to him, "I have reached the end of my rapidly fraying rope!"  He ties my knot and then takes over.  Bathing the kids, keeping them fed and alive while I'm gone, playing with them on the floor, taking them out to do chores so I can have 10 minutes of quiet.

25.  Digital scrapbooking - I always wanted to be a scrapbooker.  Have fancy do-dads, pretty papers, lots of tools.  I wanted to immortalize my children's lives in paper art that I created with my own hands. But alas, I can't.  I'm not that creative.  I don't have that kind of time.  And I'm too cheap.  Enter my friend, A.T., who said "Hey, you should try digital scrapping."  She was using the Week-At-A-Glance from Becky Higgins.  Wow!  This was something I could do with small children underfoot.  And I could do one copy and print three books, one for each kid!  So, each year I do "The Carlson Family Yearbook".  No muss, no fuss.  And it's a beautiful record of our family life.

26.  Soup - I could eat soup every day of the week and twice on Sunday.  And now, since our new church is at 11:30, we don't get home until almost 1pm (which is the very sacred nap time).  I have to have dinner ready to eat when we walk in the door.  So I've declared Soup Sunday.  I put a soup in the crockpot in the morning and when we get home, dish it up and eat!

27.  Chocolate Chip Cookies - And not just any chocolate chip cookies, THESE chocolate chip cookies.  Generations of children will sing your praises if you make these cookies.  We're already on two generations in this family!

28.  Blogs by Women who are awesome - I have waayyy too many to list them all here, but someday I'll figure out how to list them on a sidebar of the blog and then you'll know who I'm reading.  I love my blog reader that lets me keep up with all my favorite blogs.

29.  Online Shopping - You probably know by now that I'm no fan of shopping.  Especially in stores.  I do try and buy local and thrift store it if I can.  But if I can't, I do love to look online.  Like for goat milking supplies, preschool curriculum, obscure Christmas presents for Hubby, etc.

30.  Writing - I never thought that anyone (besides Hubby and my mom) would read this blog.  And to be honest, I think my mom has given up reading it.  But so many of you have joined in, I'm amazed actually.  When I first starting writing in college, it was scientific research papers.  And I think we can all breathe a sigh of relief I don't write those anymore.  Even though I could probably annotate with the best of 'em.  My stunning research on global warming, specifically the Antarctic ice cores, is still riveting and culturally relevant (I was there, long before Al Gore), I've come a long way.  All the way to morning sickness and naked chickens and how I met Hubby.  Pulitzer prize winning stuff, I know you'll agree.

31.  Hot Showers - I'm not a bath taking person.  Certainly not since Kiddo1 was born and she pooped all over me in the bathtub.  No siree.  Thank you, but no thank you.  I prefer not to sit in the tepid water of my own filth.  A good hot shower where all that stuff runs down the drain is more my style.  And I mean HOT.  Hot enough to raise your body temperature.  Ahhhhh, love it!

32.  That I have a good meeting story - I always wanted a memorable meeting-my-husband story and I got it!  Which is bested only by our engagement story...

33.  Passionate people - I can completely disagree with you, but if you are passionate, we can have a discussion.  The biggest turn-off I have when meeting someone is lack of passion.  A ho-hum attitude toward life, vocation, hobbies, etc.  I love passionate people, like Dr. Dwayne Beck, for example.

34.  Cooking - I love to cook.  Every year it is tradition for me to cook a big birthday dinner for myself and invite some friends over.  This year it's German food:  pork roast, cheese buttons or strudles, and green bean casserole.  For breakfast we're having sausage gravy and biscuits.  For lunch it's taco salad.  And for dinner, Hubby says I can go anywhere except Chinese food.  As much as I love to cook, it's sometimes nice to go out as well.

35.  Christmas carols - As I already mentioned, I've played the piano for over 30 years.  Many of those was with my mom in our church.  Although we had more than one pianist in our church, they rotated months and Mom always got December.  So I learned, at a young age, to play all the Christmas carols.  Some of the best hymnal arrangements are those carols.  And I love obscure ones as well!  One of my personal favorites is "The Friendly Beasts".

And lastly,
36.  I love sleep.  I'm going to get some right now.

What do  you love??

Love Languages

Last night, Kiddo1 sat me down in the living room and said, "Mama, I want to talk about Christmas.  I want to talk and you want to write this down.  Here's what we need to do about Christmas..."  This is very typical for my 4.5 year old, first born daughter.  She is not being bossy.  She is worried about Christmas.  See, her love language is gifts.  When I travel for work, I always try to bring back something for her (even if it is the hotel soap) because a gift, no matter how small, means love to her.  It's her "love language".  It's how she receives love.

This is certainly not my invention.  No siree. Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a phenomenal book "The Five Love Languages".  If you've not read this book, you must.  It will solve all manner of mis-communication.

According to Dr. Chapman, the five love languages are:
Physical Touch
Gifts
Quality Time
Words of Affirmation
Acts of Service

All of us have a primary love language and most of us have a secondary language.  Kiddo1 is Gifts, primary and Physical Touch, secondary.  When we sit together to read in the evening, she always says, "Rub me, Mama.  Rub me."  And I'll rub her back or arm while I read.

I'm not entirely convinced but I think that Kiddo2's primary language is Quality Time.  He just likes to be near you and he doesn't like to leave home.

Kiddo3 is a wildcard.  I think her love language is Horrendous Messes.  That seems to be when she's the happiest.

A rather large challenge in our marriage is that Hubby and I have completely different love languages.  He is Physical Touch, by a landslide.  Like nothing else even comes close.  I, sorry to say, am not.  Physical Touch is my last love language.  A friend of ours shared with us that the animal equivalent of Physical Touch is a cat.  They crave touch.  Have to have it.  Will rub themselves on your leg just to feel touch.  That, my friends, is my husband.  I can stand completely still and he will still hug me.  Or hang on me.  Or touch me in some way.  And remember, Physical Touch is my LAST love language.  I have a touch quota and when that is filled, I don't want to be touched.  And with three small children who require all manner of touching throughout a day, I get "touched-out" pretty fast.

As you might imagine, this does not communicate LOVE to my husband.  It communicates the opposite.  I don't want him to feel unloved so I shower him with my love language, Acts of Service.  I do things for people.  I'm a do-er.  If you really want me to be over-the-moon about you, just do something for me or help me do something.  Oh boy, I love it.  I absolutely love it.  Hubby does not.  He doesn't understand why anyone would/should work so hard.

If you're wondering what my animal equivalent is, it's a goldfish.  Clean my bowl, feed me, watch me from afar.  That's what makes me happy.

It was devastating in the first few years of our marriage when I would do my darnedest to fix Hubby's favorite meal, tidy up his things, do little jobs for him and he wouldn't even notice.  And if I pointed them out, it didn't really matter to him.

Only after understanding that we have different definitions of love, could we really start to communicate effectively.  It was unbelievable to Hubby that I couldn't care less if I was hugged, but I'd be head-over-heels for him if he put the dishes away or bathed the kids.  And I couldn't believe that someone wouldn't want to jump at the chance to help someone they loved.

Have we completely figured it out?  Nope.  But we know what makes the other tick and we're working hard to meet each other's needs, even if it isn't what we think of as LOVE.

So, have a difference in love languages caused any miscommunication in your relationships??

Becoming a Mom - Morning Sickness

I don't follow pop culture.  Not having TV will do that to you.  When I stand in line at the grocery store, I don't recognize any of the names on the covers of the magazines, unless it's Jennifer Aniston.  I didn't watch the royal wedding, nor did I want to.  Apparently (thanks to my royal-following friends on facebook), the princess is pregnant and suffering from morning sickness.  This required the Today Show to send a correspondent to London to cover this breaking news story.

Really?!  This is news??!!  If so, I was making news for about four years straight.

You see, there is this myth that is perpetrated by women and magazines and TV shows and talk show doctors.  And the myth is that pregnancy is this wonderful experience.  That you glow for nine months.  You have a beautifully rounded and cute baby belly.  That you and your husband giggle and swoon at each other.  That you will never feel better than when you are pregnant.

And that may be true for some women.  And those are the women who pontificate about the joy of pregnancy.

{Let me just say right here and now, that I know there are women who would go through anything to be pregnant.  Some of them are my best friends and I have shared their pain.}

But there are other experiences for some of us.  Those experiences aren't talked about as much.  Your experience may be different, I'll share mine and feel free to share yours.

I have three children:  14 and 18 months apart.  I was pregnant and/or nursing for almost 4 years.  While getting pregnant was not a problem, being pregnant was a challenge for me.  I threw up.  A lot.  And not just in the morning.  Any time of the day.

I would walk into a store and have to look where the nearest bathroom or garbage can was in case I needed it.  And I did need it, more than a few times.

Hubby asked during the first pregnancy, "Don't you feel better?  It's been like four days!"  I may or may not have snapped at him, "It's a baby, not the flu!"  And it isn't the flu.  You can feel perfectly fine and eat a great meal and 20 minutes later, without any warning, up it comes.  And then you want to eat again.  There were days I would 5 or 6 meals, and keep 2 of them down.  Any day I didn't throw up was a good day.

In my experience, most people are clueless and assume that everyone has the glowing, happy pregnancy.  People would kindly inquire as to how I was feeling, "Don't you just feel wonderful?"  No, I've never been sicker in my life!  Then they'd say, "Well, that ends after the first trimester."  Nope, I threw up all nine months and in the hospital...with all three kids!

Especially in my first pregnancy, I had a lot of doubt.  Why wasn't I feeling good?  Why wasn't this the best time of my life?  I was miserable.  And all I kept hearing was women telling me, "I never felt better than when I was pregnant."  I had never felt worse.  After throwing up in the middle of the night, I drug myself back to bed and Hubby said, "What's wrong?"  I may or may not have replied, "Your dumb baby."  And then of course, that was immediately followed by the guilt of even thinking that about the miracle growing inside of me.

When I was pregnant with Kiddo2, Kiddo1 was just a year old.  She would come into the bathroom when I was throwing up and pat the back of my leg.  She couldn't talk, but she knew that I needed comfort.  Kiddo2 would cry when I was pregnant with Kiddo3.  How do you explain to a 14 month old that mommy is OK?  It sure didn't sound like I was OK.

Don't misunderstand, I love my children and I loved giving birth to them.  But pregnancy isn't all sunshine and roses for some of us.  Some of us struggle.  Some of us can't get pregnant.  Some of us can't stay pregnant.  Know that you are NOT alone.  There has been someone who has been where you are.  And it's OK to talk about it.  Women like me need you to talk about it.  We need to hear that it was hard, scary, anxious...whatever.

So, Princess Kate, you are not alone.  And as you bend over your loo in your water closet, just know that I have been there.  All of this will be worth it, I absolutely promise!!

The first basketball game

Last night we took the kiddos to their first ever basketball game.  And we didn't go because we have a desperate need to see basketball on a Monday night.  Nope, we went to see our niece cheerlead.

Yes, you read that right.  I went to a basketball game to watch a cheerleader.

(My former players and fellow coaches are groaning right now.)

I used to be a basketball coach.  For five years and 10 seasons.  Some of you are trying to do the math on that one.  Back in the old days, when girls and boys played basketball at different times, I coached girls basketball in the fall and boys in the winter.  It was awesome, really awesome.  I loved every minute of it.

We got the news that our beloved niece would be just 20 miles from THE FARM and would love it if we could come.  So come we did!  Kiddo1 was very excited, "I'm going to pack up all my toys and live with Cousin!"  And she meant it.  Although I did dissuade her from actually packing, she was pretty sure Cousin would let her live with her.

Hubby is not a sports guy.  At all.  But in an ironic twist of God-given ability, he is AMAZINGLY athletic.  Like do anything physical he ever wanted to athletic.  Like waterski and wakeboard and bowl and chuck square bales with ease athletic.  Having watched my share of athletes, he ranks at the top for natural athleticism.  Whereas, his wife ranks right near the bottom.  Seriously, very little athleticism here.  Plenty of passion, desire, and motivation...no athleticism.  My sister and brother were both college athletes on scholarship, proving once again that I am the black sheep of my family.

I tell you all that to tell you this.

We take our three kiddos who have never been to a basketball game and who don't really sit for even a 45 minute church service and we drive 20 miles getting more and more excited to see our cousin.

And when we get there, we don't see her.  For a whole half of the JV game.  The novelty of basketball lasts for about 3.2 minutes and then the kiddos are ready to run.  Just like the big kids on the shiny hardwood floor.  Hubby and I are outnumbered.  Thankfully, I had tucked some snack size m&ms into my purse in such an event that bribes distractions would be needed.  It worked!  For another 2.7 minutes.  Work in a trip to the bathroom for the big kids and we're only at the end of the third quarter.

There were let's-see-who-can-see-Cousin-first games, watch-and-see-if-he-makes-it games, cheering games, bouncing-on-knees-games.  Those morphed into warnings which worked well for Kiddo1 and 2...not at all for Kiddo3 who is firmly in the TESTING phase of almost-two-land.

Now we're in between games and times are tough.  There's nothing to see and a whole open gym floor not being used and "Could we please just go touch it???"  No.  Sit down and watch for your cousin.

Finally, in a crowd of purple and black clad young women is the wonder that is our niece.  We haven't seen her since the summer and boy have we missed her.  Kiddo1 screamed and leapt into her arms.  Kiddo2 danced around waiting for his hug.  Kiddo3 hid.  Hubby and I both hugged her as well.  Kiddo1 loved her pompoms and the bow in her hair.  All three kids waved and smiled every time Cousin looked over at us.

For two minutes.

Kiddo1 wanted to go stand with Cousin.  Kiddo2 wanted to go to, but he wanted to take the mask off of the mascot so he wasn't so scary.  Kiddo3 just wanted to run.

Time to employ distraction #2:  popcorn.  Three bags of popcorn and two bottles of water later, peace and serenity rained up there in the fifth row.  For a whole half of basketball, my children sat in a little line between their parents and swung their little feet and munched contentedly on their bags of popcorn.

Bliss.

But there is only so much popcorn toddler tummies can hold.  And we reached that point just into the third quarter.  The older two kiddos continued to sit pretty well.  Not Kiddo3.  We had fueled her with popcorn and water and she was ready to go!  {sigh}  There were lunges and grabs and extended hugs while sitting on laps.  Finally, Hubby took her out to the van for some running and fresh air and her bippy (pacifier).  This got us to the 4th quarter.  Almost there!

I won't give you the scamper by lunge account, but let's just say frustrations were high.  Particularly with ourselves because why did we think our kids could/would sit through a basketball game and a half.  I thought to myself, "No one else's kids are acting like this."  And then I looked around.  And there were no toddlers at the game.  None.

And that made me a little sad.  Not because I wanted to see someone else's children squirm and dance and attempt to flee to the shiny gym floor, but because there were no families enjoying basketball together.  Watching older kids.  Learning how to sit on a bleacher at a sporting event.

So while it was our first game and it didn't go particularly well, it won't be our last.  And our kids will learn how to sit.  Which means I'll be buying them each two bags of popcorn.

Why Advent?

To many people, it's the Christmas season or the Holiday season.  To our family, it's the Advent season.

Advent is not Christmas.  Advent is the season before Christmas.  Advent is the season of preparation, of waiting expectantly, of reflection.  The word advent means "coming" or "arrival".

Advent is not the making and checking off of shopping lists.  Not that kind of preparation.  Instead, it is the preparation of our hearts to receive the most important gift of all, God-made-man, God-dwelling-among-us, Emmanuel.  We celebrate four weeks of Advent and each week has a theme:  Hope, Love, Joy and Peace.

My dad made each of his children an Advent wreath.  {And if I could find my USB cord, I'd share a picture of it with you.}  Ours graces our table and this year we will light it each evening.  We light one candle each week.  Each night we read a Bible passage and do an Advent craft to remind ourselves of the story of Advent.  This first week we are reading passages from the Old Testament that speak of the nation of Israel's longing for a Savior and the promise made by God through the prophets that one would come to them.

I love this first week, this week of Hope.  It is a wonderful time to reflect on the Hope we have in Christ.  That even though we live in a fallen, sinful world as fallen, sinful creatures, this is not all there is.  

Do you celebrate Advent?  How do you celebrate?

Unknown blog readers

Two days ago, Suzanne gave the most milk that she has given since we moved her to THE FARM.  I told Hubby about it and he said, "She probably read your blog post!"

Who knew the wireless worked in the barn?  They are probably huddled around an iPad that they keep hidden under the hay bales...

A Unique Obsession

One of my pet-peeves-turned-unique-obsession is mis-spelling or blatantly incorrect agriculture terms.  Particularly from people who should know better.  A favorite of mine is the online classified ads.   There always sure to be at least one.

The most common?  An ad for hay that says "hay bails for sale".  Ummm, no.  "Bail" is something you pay to get out of jail.  "Bale" is a lump of hay.

Others?  An ad offering "weathers for sale".  Ummmm, no.  You aren't selling atmospheric conditions, you are selling "wethers", castrated male sheep.

Last night I was watching TV (that's how you know I'm traveling, we don't have TV at home), as I flipped to the Discovery Channel they were hunting wild pigs.  As the very southern accented `hunter let a large black pig go saying, "That one is a sow."  The announcer broke in to say "A sow is a female boar."

Whoa!  WHAT??!!  You are the Discovery Channel.  Children and adults turn to you for educational programming.  You aren't TV Land for pete's sake, get your facts straight!

A boar is an intact male.  He has testicles.  The female version of that would be a transvestite.  And there are no transvestite pigs.